Bizarro World Movie Reviews -- The Tooth Fairy

There are movies we see as children that stay with us throughout our lives. They play a role in guiding us, helping to shape our values and becoming at least a small piece of who we are. Films like Wizard of Oz, E.T., Willy Wonka and Mary Poppins are part of our lives and stay with people who see them as children long after they've grown into adulthood. Parents often take great pleasure watching these movies with their own children, an act that both passes on part of the legacy of their youth to the next generation and allows them to become children themselves again if only for a short time. Now, at the dawn of a new decade, a new film has arisen to join that vaunted pantheon of precious children's movies that will be watched and treasured for decades to come. That movie is Dwayne Johnson's The Tooth Fairy.

I imagine the movie's tagline, "You Can't Handle The Tooth," will become a national catchphrase for decades to come as the movie seeps into our culture and our history. Right now we all get the pleasure of speculating which scenes will become iconic touchstones that will make us smile when we think of them.

The movie stars Dwayne Johnson who used to wrestle under the name "The Rock" and here it's obvious why as he is the Rock upon which this movie builds the dreams and wonders that delight the movie going public. He plays Derek, a hockey player who almost tells his girlfriend's daughter that the Tooth Fairy is a myth and is punished for that by becoming the Tooth Fairy. This, however, is but a fraction of his character. Johnson creates one of the most bizarrely lovable and utterly fascinating characters to ever appear on the silver screen. There are times on screen when an actor literally cannot be seen acting and instead somehow becomes the character he or she is playing. Some examples of this are Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lecter, Robert DeNiro as Jake LaMotta and now Dwayne Johnson as Derek the Tooth Fairy.

I feel sorry for future generations who will not have been here, now, when the phenomenon known as The Tooth Fairy began. This means it is our responsibility to tell the children to tell the world that there is a bar to reach, a standard that they must not only meet but surpass, a perfect star in the brightest part of the heavens that contains the best part of humanity and that the only way they can ascend and actually touch this star is to follow the lessons and principles set down so long ago by an actor named Dwayne Johnson and a character called the Tooth Fairy. This is not only how we will truly be able to "Handle the Tooth" but also how we will become worthy of doing so.