Those of you who are addicted to the red hot excitement that is this blog know that I do a regular feature called Things I've Learned From Watching Movies in which I tell everyone why you should pay more attention to the movies than you do to school. For instance, school tells you that exposure to a nuclear explosion will kill you whereas the movies tell you that the same event actually turns you into a monster when you're mad. Therefore, I prefer the fun facts of the movies to the dull "facts" of real life. Now, though, I have a dilemma.
In a couple of weeks, a movie called Journey To The Center Of The Earth will teach us that the center of the earth is a cool place with dinosaurs, carnivorous plants and vast oceans. That's awesome, right? But...
I remember back in 2003 a movie called The Core taught me that the center of the earth is a big lake of hot, gooey spinning stuff and that the spin can be stopped and started again by modern day technology.
SO WHICH IS IT?! What the hell, Hollywood? Don't you people ever get together. You're telling me that none of you ever got together and talked about this even though it's a proven fact that you all go to the same fajita bars and visit the same prostitutes? I can either tell people that the center of the earth is Jurassic Park or I can say that it's a big-ass lava lake that can be manipulated with a firecracker. If I say it's both, I'll look like an idiot.
Hopefully, someone out there knows some sort of pseudo-scientific theories that can reconcile all this for me.
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