Thursday, June 10, 2010

Look At My Briefs -- 6/10/10

On this day in 1996, one guy called another guy gay on the internet simply because he disagreed with him about a movie. Such a momentous occasion can only be properly recognized with another edition of my brief comments on various subjects I like to call Look At My Briefs.

Tomorrow is A-Team day which means we only have to wait one more day for that stupid CGI scene where they're shooting at planes from some sort of parachuting escape hatch thing. They may have made that scene look better than the clip shown in the trailer but I doubt it. This would be worth it to see Dirk Benedict write some crazy article about another of his characters being played by someone else like he did when a woman was cast to play Starbuck but so far, no such luck.

One of the reasons given for Megan Fox being pushed out of the Transformers series is that Michael Bay thought her recent 10 pound weight loss had rendered her too skinny. That, of course, explains why he cast this whale to replace her. (Probably SFW but exercise a bit of caution.)

My answer to this question is no, I do not want a Les Grossman movie. Tom Cruise reminded everyone that the character existed this week when he reprised his Tropic Thunder character during this week's MTV Movie Awards. Cruise is good in the role but it's a character that has to be taken in small doses, a fact proven by the dance number that went on too long. I wouldn't mind seeing the character show up in a supporting role in another movie but to have him be center stage? No way would it work. This will be just like Dana Carvey's Church Lady movie, something he was smart enough never to attempt.

UPDATE 1:30 PM: Once again, Hollywood does the exact opposite of what I advised them to do. I do honestly hope I'm wrong and this this turns out to be the greatest movie ever made and stands forever as the shining pinnacle of Tom Cruise's long and storied career though I am looking forward to getting the DVD cheap in the Wal-Mart bargain bin.

Hey ABC, you have a show called The Gates coming out next week about a gated community run by vampires. When you do a show like this, you say, "This neighborhood is so great that people are dying to get in." Seriously, what the hell is wring with your marketing department? You're welcome.

Speaking of television: TORCHWOOD IS BACK! Not only is it back but John Barrowman as Jack Harkness and Eve Myles as Gwen Cooper are back too. I was sure Eve would get the axe in favor of some 21 year old swimsuit model whose audition consisted of faking an orgasm while screwing a network executive but, no, for once they actually recognized quality and kept her on. Considering the number of character casualties sustained in season 2 and the five hour Children of Earth special, Gwen Cooper better watch her Welsh ass lest she get shot by some sort of alien ass gun. Otherwise, this is nothing but good news.

Depressing thought of the day: I live in a world where there are actually people looking forward to the release of movies like Grown Ups and Eclipse.

Other depressing thought of the day: Right now there's someone who went to film school dreaming of being the next Scorsese or Kurosawa who's going to end up directing Step Up 4.

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