Friday, April 9, 2010

Things I've Learned From Watching Movies Part 81

Hardened criminals are no match for a boring suburban couple.

Other than the fact that you'd either be killed or hunted down not only by the criminals you are hunting but by the law enforcement authorities you are trying to help, there's absolutely no reason you couldn't be a super-hero.

If you're a single woman trying to have a baby, be sure to do it in a way indistinguishable from the way a complete idiot would do it.

Sure, go ahead, rip off The A-Team. No one will notice.

Sure, go ahead, rip off Death Wish AND Gran Torino. No one will notice.

Sure, go ahead, rip off Gladiator. No one...oh, screw it.

I'm not one for telling super villains how to do their jobs but instead of whips, maybe use a bomb? Or a rocket launcher?

Instead of...I mean, go ahead and...remakes...I got nothing.

The fact that every movie ever made that was based on a video game completely and utterly sucked means that the odds are this one will be good. Right?

Movie ideas involving zombies are limitless, mainly because they're all the same.

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