Friday, July 3, 2009

Right Wing Movie Reviews -- Transformers 2

Regular readers already know about Gotterdamerung, a conservative blogger who often takes issue with what he perceives as my liberal bias. Today he has demanded space here to respond to what he says is the left wing take I had on Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. I said I thought my review was at all political and he said, "Same thing." Whatever, here's Gotterdamerung.

Hi all. I've been reading the various reviews of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen in utter disbelief. Almost all of them concentrate on the stupid plot, the messy editing, the poorly conceived effects and, well, everything else. I just cannot understand how so many people, audience and critics alike, missed the film's deeply positive message about religion and conservative values and its vindication of the right wing worldview.

Oh sure, it's all told symbolically. You can't go to socialist fascist communist nazi gay Hollywood and say, "I want to make a pro-America movie that blows the lid off of Obama's liberty-destroying agenda." No, you have to do this quietly and cleverly while the Leftist Overlords who run the movie business think you're making a movie about toys come to life.

It was obvious to me that the leader of the good Transformers, Optimus Prime, was modeled after George W. Bush while Barack Obama is represented by the Decepticon leader Megatron. It turns out that Megatron serves a Transformer called the Fallen, a creature who wants to destroy the Sun. This is similar to the way the Democrat Party is trying to destroy capitalism through the socialist myth of global warming.

Shia LeBeouf's character, Sam, represents the accomplished individual that the liberal Decepticons are trying to bring down. Sam touched the All-Spark and now has special alien knowledge in his head. The Decepticons are, after a fashion, trying to institute an excessive tax on Sam's brain and simply take away all for which Sam has worked so hard. Sam won't have that though and he fights off the Decepticons with the help of his girlfriend played by Megan Fox, a character who was so clearly based on Sarah Palin that I can't believe even the clueless liberal media missed it. This means that, once again, the lying libtards are intentionally trying to take glory away from Sarah Palin.

When Sam hooks up with the Autobots, Optimus Prime sacrifices himself to save him. Does that remind you of anything? Like, maybe, the way George W. Bush sacrificed himself to save us? And yes, liberals, I know Bush didn't actually sacrifice his life, but he did sacrifice his public image and his legacy in order to wipe the stain of Islam from the Middle East and make Iraq the 51st state. Anyway, Optimus is down and now the world seems almost certain to suffer defeat at the hands of the Terrorist Democrat Decepticons EXCEPT that Sam has placed his faith in Optimus Prime and, by extension, George Bush, the Republican Party and God Himself. Those three have never let anyone down who truly had faith in them. I mean, yeah, it sometimes looks like they've let down pretty much everyone to varying degrees, but only liberals would focus on a "fact" like that and not embrace the idea that the Holy Trinity of God, Republicans and Bush have never let anybody down. Thus, Same comes up with a way to bring Bush/Optimus back to life and defeat Obama/Megatron, the Decepticons and their human allies at (a plot point I assume was edited out for reasons of length).

Those elitist prigs we call "movie critics" thoroughly trashed this rare gem of conservative ideology but our center-right nation ignored them and rewarded a movie, directed by true Christian Michael Bay, that truly reflects their values with record setting opening week profits. Hopefully, Hollywood will learn from this and produce some ever more blatantly conservative films and make a fortune for themselves in the process. Probably not, though, since they get their marching orders from the Democrat Party, Obama's White House and Hell. The best evidence of this is that yet another Harry Potter film is coming out this month, a series of movies that tries to indoctrinate our children with the idea that secular sorcery is the answer to all of life's ills and that someone other than God can beat Lord Voldemort, a character obviously modeled after Al Franken.

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