Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Hardcase and Tinpants

Recently, while lunching with a friend in a coffee shop, I tried to come up with what I thought would be a really bad idea for a movie. I came up with a rogue cop who is constantly in trouble with his superiors because he sometimes breaks the rules to get the job done is partnered with a sexy female android to fight a group of drug dealing werewolves. Little did I know that an executive from Universal Studios was sitting behind me. He immediately offered me a six figure deal to option my "awesome idea". This sparked a bidding war among all major studios and, finally, Fox's $3 million sealed the deal.

So, on 2010's July 4 weekend, you can all go the the movies and see Gerard Butler play Alan "Hardcase" Randall, a cop whose punishment for roughing up a crack dealer who was selling to 4th graders is to partner with a new police officer android prototype played by Jessica Alba called Mya 4 whom Hardcase derisively nicknames Tinpants. Mya is uneducated in what is acceptable behavior for humans thought this mostly means she walks around in her underwear a lot and asks Hardcase to teach her how to have sex. Oh, almost forgot, they fight drug dealing werewolves led by Alan Rickman. He asks Hardcase, "Are you and I really so different, Mr. Randall?" before trying to make him into a werewolf. Mya saves him and they almost kiss but don't cause we're saving that for the sequel.

See you in 2010. I suggest you buy your tickets for Hardcase and Tinpants now.

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