Friday, December 18, 2009

The Greatest of Words

Here it is, Avatar Day. It looks like this will be a very good movie (review should be up on Monday). Luckily, I've managed to get hold of a copy of the script and, if James Cameron managed to put even a portion of this on the screen, this movie will walk away with even more Oscars than Titanic received. To prove my point, I've excerpted some choice quotes and reprinted them here. If you get overwhelmed, don't fight it. Just let these words wash over you and work their magic.

"Wow, this futuristic crap is awesome."

"Wouldn't mind finding out if every bit of you is blue, if you know what I mean. Heh heh."

"I think it's just great that hair and clothing styles haven't changed since 2009."

"This planet blows. Why couldn't our rare, valuable elements have been on a planet where ice cream grows on trees and the animals give you handjobs?"

"In retrospect, we should have figured out the guy in the wheelchair would betray us. Pretty much the same thing happened in the 20th century film Dances With Wolves."

"Jeez, it's 2163 and we still haven't invented lightsabres."

"This planet is so vivid, I feel like we're in 3-D or something."

"There's nothing to do on this planet. We don't even have a damn Sbarro's and the only movies in our DVD collection are Twilight and Bride Wars."

"I have to admire the way our species made it to other worlds after the cataclysmic natural disasters on 2012."

"Sure, that rock we mine here is a good source of income but I really started raking in the cash when I started the very first Na'vi upskirt website."

"We have built a statue to history's greatest hero, James Cameron, a man admired for his visionary filmmaking skills as well as his 14 inch penis."

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